The Daily Dose 10/2/2011 – Ctrl Z cartoon and Top Ten Ctrl+z jokes

Ctrl Z cartoon and Top 10 Ctrl+Z jokes

“You can’t always Ctrl Z what you want, but if you try sometimes, you just might find, you undo what you need.'” — Yasha Harari

“Top 10 Ctrl+Z jokes”

10. A Priest, a Rabbi and an Imam walk into three gorgeous identical blondes. The blondes hit Ctrl+Z.

9. Would the economy be in its current state if investors could Ctrl Z their actions?

8. Bottle blondes hate bad hair products because there’s no Ctrl+Z on a bleach FAIL.

7. Haiku: There’s no Ctrl Z in the real world we live in, beyond computers.

6. Would Gadaffi still be the dictator of Libya if he could Ctrl+Z back to the time before the Arab Spring?

5. Would China be a growing major geopolitical threat to the United States, if Ctrl Z were President?

4. Zen masters do not need Ctrl+Z because every outcome is karmically interconnected.

3. Outside of design and manufacturing, the best known potential application for a Ctrl Z device in real life would be politicians who need to backpedal.

2. Economists don’t need a physical Ctrl+Z device because they just assume they have one.

… and the #1 Ctrl Z joke  is:

1. Protest Slogan: What do we want? CTRL Z! When do we want it? Whenever we need to Undo something!

Reference: Yasha Harari for TheDailyDose.com.

 

The Daily Dose 8/28/2011 – Microsoft (Religion) vs. Open Source (Atheism) cartoon and Top Ten jokes

 

Microsoft vs. Open Source cartoon and Top 10 OS jokes

 

“Open Source software operates in a multiverse, where everything is possible and everyone is welcome to do their own thing. Microsoft operates in a top-down, dogmatic, Flat Earth digital Universe, where as far as they are concerned, everything revolves around them, and everything else is considered unenlightened and sinful.” — Yasha Harari

“Top 10 OS jokes”

10. If at first you don’t succeed at installing your OS, try, try again. If it keeps failing on you, ask yourself why you bought that Microsoft product.

9. Microsoft’s logo is its name, in a boring, squarish font. Open Source OSes have cute, curvy, friendly logos.  Which would you rather spend time with?

8. An OS by any other name, would be as complicated to develop.

7. Digital Genesis: In the Beginning, Man created closed Operating Systems, and it was Good, but it came at a terrible price. Later, He created Open Source, and it was Better, plus it was free.

6. If the Church of Microsoft wanted to convert free thinking Open Source OS developers, then they would not rely on marketing their obsolete, dogmatic wares instead of making better products.

5. If Microsoft is organized religion, then Open Source is Atheism and Apple is Agnosticism, because they use an Open Source OS in a closed top-down way.

4. The Who said “Never trust anyone over thirty”. The Open Source OS Developer said “Never trust anyone over-invested in a closed OS”.

3. Closed Operating Systems do not weather the constant storms of change. Open Source OSes are a form of change.

2. Microsoft, like dinosaurs, were once the most powerful entities on Earth. Dinosaurs are extinct. Open Source OSes started out small, and are built for successful adaptation over time. Which would you rather be?

… and the #1 OS joke is:

1. A blonde, a drunk and an alien walk up to a bar, but it’s a Microsoft bar, so it’s closed. leaving our three characters with nothing to do but have fun together and develop their own network of free, open source bars.

Reference: Yasha Harari for TheDailyDose.com.

 

 

 

Read more: http://thedailydose.com/2011/08/28/organized-religion-is-microsoft-atheism-is-open-source/#ixzz1WJiHoPz0

The Daily Dose 8/16/2011 – This Is Your Privacy Online cartoon and Top Ten Internet Privacy jokes

Online Privacy cartoon and Top 10 Internet privacy jokes

“As the Internet grows, the choice of massive online social networks dwindles, and with it, your right to keep private your psycho pink bunny outfit pics.” — Yasha Harari

“Top 10 Internet Privacy jokes”

10. The Internet used to be a place where you could remain nameless, and everyone knew you are a dog. Now the Internet is so large, and so constricted by large networks, that you can only remain nameless if your name is Anonymous.

9. Emails are postcards. Tweets are notes you pass around in class that everyone sees.

8. The best method for keeping your privacy online is not to be online. The second best method to keep your privacy online is to publish junk nobody cares to look at. 

7. Do you really think former Congressman Anthony Weiner would have been forced out of office for publicly tweeting his Weiner, if Bill Clinton were President?

6. The EFF has long fought to protect people’s freedoms and privacy online. If you’ve never heard of the EFF, that tells you how well they’ve done.

5. If Facebook and Google really believed that your online privacy is important, then why won’t they verify the discrete account of Mr. Snuffleupagus?

4. American Labor Unions believe workers should have complete privacy in their personal time online, except when it comes to their votes on Union related matters.

3. The term ‘digital fingerprints‘ is redundant.

2. If you want to confuse the Googlers, create a Google account and sign up for every service they offer, and fill it with blank documents, and other documents that tell the Google crawlers that you are reading their email in order to deliver more targeted ads to them.

… and the #1 Internet Privacy joke is:

1. If it’s online, it’s public. If it’s offline, it may be private, until a digital recording device shows up.

Reference: Yasha Harari for TheDailyDose.com. 

 

The Daily Dose 6/13/2011 – Modern Warfare cartoon and Top Ten modern war jokes

:^) Monday, June 13, 2011 {Vol. 15, # 121} (^8

Laughzilla’s Last Link! (Now Up Front!)

Words of War

Funny One Liner:

“The rules of Modern Warfare have changed. These days you can’t fire a missile without someone firing a missive online.” ~ Yasha Harari

The Daily Dose Joke:

“Top 10 modern warfare jokes” 10) With all the money the militaryhas invested in virtual battle simulators, no wonder there is no money left for creating real peaceful stimulators. 9) The internet has changed the way humans fight wars. These days if you drop bombs it will end up on many dot coms. 8) For security reasons, soldiers are not supposed to facebook or twitter their locations, positions or situations. They leave that to Congressmen. 7) Revolution is how tanks wheely move. 6) Navy Sailor Finder: An unnecessary mobile app on a warship at sea. 5) Special Forces use twitter, facebook and google to profile the enemy, while the ACLU cries about it. 4) Don’t Tread On Me was not a reference to being crushed by a tank. 3) The internet was created by the US Department of Defense to share information, which is why it’s ironic that the internet is how folks share so much indefensible information about war. 2) You can’t stop a bullet with a tweet or a youtube video, but online you can make that shot heard around the world. … and the #1 modern warfare joke is: 1) The defense industry exhibits the evolution of warfare at war fairs. Reference: Yasha Harari forTheDailyDose.com.

Read more:http://www.thedailydose.com/archives/2011/the-daily-dose-Monday,_2011-06-13,_08:55.html#ixzz1PAH5qm7s